Wearing All The Hats
I wear all the hats.
In no particular order: I am a life partner, a business owner, a mom, a friend, a sibling, a daughter, an aunt, and an autonomous human being who used to struggle with juggling all of the hats. And while I can’t pretend I have it totally figured out, I can say that I stopped throwing the hats in the air and began wearing my own hat most.
I’ve been choosing to lean into what my needs are and accepting them as if they were meant for me.. because I believe that they are.
Committing to meeting my own needs as often as possible allows me to be the best version of myself as often as possible. I like it here in this state. I like spending time as my calm, joyful, and loving self. It’s who I aspire to be for myself so that I can be it for the others in my life, too (and for my biz).
It needs to be said:
I am not this version of myself all day every day.
This past weekend was a national holiday for Turkey. Schools were closed at noon on Thursday until Monday, and Reyla and Derya had a performance on Sunday at our village’s children’s festival to celebrate Children’s Day that is honored on April 23rd every year.
The long weekend was overstimulating and exhausting sprinkled with some really magical moments. You don’t have to have 3 kids, like I do, to know what I am talking about. Being in a caregiving role in any type of relationship can cause this type of overstimulation and exhaustion.
REAL TALK.
Some of what I experienced as a result of this long weekend:
-less sleep
I am still co-sleeping with Atlas while Güven co-sleeps with the girls. Break up the kids’ normal routine while every body you know feeds them sugar (hello holiday time), and expect a peaceful bedtime and sleep? It doesn’t happen, obviously.
-different diet
My days are centered around what, where, and when I feed these young mouths. And I typically end up eating whatever they don’t eat off their plates. Which sometimes is not a lot of food, and sometimes it’s too much food and I end up binging. My body doesn’t feel it’s best after left over pasta, burgers, and pizza, obviously.
-less alone time
No meditating, no showering or using the bathroom without interruptions, no time to process my range of emotions, less time to connect with myself or my partner. It’s t o u g h .
What does all this lead to for me?
Disconnection.
It’s hard to enjoy the small moments with my kids, its hard to enter their worlds to communicate clearly, its hard to stay patient, it’s hard to not let my emotions take over while triggered, and really hard for me to communicate with my life partner.
I totally disconnect from my life and can sometimes forget happiness exists. But, those feelings are temporary. They don’t last forever, thankfully. And after moving through them, I can begin to reconnect again slowly beginning with myself first. I put my own hat back on before I put the kid’s hats on if we want to stick with my original analogy.
I look back on this past long weekend, and while I wasn’t p e r f e c t (because I am never going to be that), I am super proud of how I showed up for myself, asking for rest, taking time away, requesting a NAP! .. past versions of myself would have n e v e r asked for a nap.
I’m doing some serious growing these days.
So proud.
So, while I wanted to spend today in creation mode and show up for Together Textiles enthusiastically, I am allowing myself to share this short story with you and catch up on some listening. It’s important to care for myself right now because I only have until school pick up time to fill my cup before the next challenge arrives.
Some of the really magical moments I talked about earlier:
About Together Textiles:
Cozy, sustainable, and versatile, Together Textiles designs robes and towels traditionally woven on looms in Turkey using the same techniques passed down four generations. Purchasing from Together Textiles means you are supporting an ancient craft, along with a budding family of five who loves connecting with the local communities while splitting time between Turkey and America. Follow the family business journey on Instagram @togethertextiles or read the blog togethertextiles.com/blog.